Dealing with Disappointment
By Garrett Chow
Lets face it, life isn’t easy and there always seems to be something lurking around the corner just waiting to ruin our day. At 23, what could I possibly know about disappointment and hardships? I’ll admit, my life has been somewhat safe up to this point, but each person’s experiences carry a different weight at every point in his or her life.
I think a lot. Sometimes, maybe too much. I often catch myself over-analyzing and looking for meaning in the most ordinary situations. However, I don’t think I’m alone in this.
This past week, I did some of that thinking and I asked myself, “Why do we get disappointed?”
I thought to myself, “Because things didn’t go according to the way I had planned…”
Just as I was thinking this, the thought stopped abruptly on the word “I”. It was as if I was coming to realization as the sentence progressed.
Naturally, we have ideals. We dream and envision life playing out in our minds.
Fundamentally, this is not a bad thing. However, when the story doesn’t go according to our plan, we experience disappointment.
Here are 3 things that God has been teaching me about disappointment.
1) God is good
Romans 8:28:
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose
When God says “no,” the cliché Christian response is, “trust him, because he has better for us!” While I do believe this is true, I often fall into the habit of telling God what “better” is. If I get passed on for the promotion, it doesn’t necessarily mean that a seven-figure job is waiting around the corner. Trusting God isn’t believing he will do things according to my ideology but rather that he is good and loves us. He doesn’t operate according to our insecurities or on our timelines.
2) Hold on to truth
The enemy loves when we’re disappointed because we’re vulnerable. In my moments of disappointment, the enemy feeds lies into my head. Things like sin is acceptable once in a while if I’ve been good, or that God doesn’t listen to my prayers. Satan is sneaky, but in these times I run to Jesus like a black Friday door crasher. The enemy has no attack against the comfort of our savior. It’s like recruiting the biggest kid in the schoolyard (and then some) as your buddy.
3) Breakthrough requires patience
As a 2nd generation Chinese Canadian, I take pride in breaking stereotypes. Therefore, math was not exactly my strong point in high school. Countless times I remember being stumped on a problem in which I then peek at my neighbour’s finished work sheet wondering, “How did you do that?” When we experience disappointment, we often recognize that God is trying to teach us something. However, he doesn’t give us the answers right away. When I finally solved the math question, I never forgot it because of the struggle to get there. We want instant answers but sometimes God wants us to live through disappointment in order to grow.
I am not implying that God sits at his heavenly throne, toying with our lives like puppets nor does he frown upon wishful thinking. What I am saying is that we can’t expect God to direct life according to our script.
He isn’t content with riding shotgun, but rather he loves it when we offer him the driver’s seat because it shows we trust him.
If the creator of the universe and time itself loves me enough to take the wheel, I’m more than happy to come along for the ride.